Friday, December 12, 2008

Things Mom Would Never Say

1. "How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?"
2. "Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too"
3. "Just leave all the lights on ... it makes the house look more cheery"
4. "Let me smell that shirt -- Yeah, it's good for another week"
5. "Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I'll be glad to feed and walk him every day"
6. "Well, if Timmy's mom says it's OK, that's good enough for me."
7. "The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It's not like I'm running a prison around here."
8. "I don't have a tissue with me ... just use your sleeve"
9. "Don't bother wearing a jacket - the wind-chill is bound to improve"


Sally said...

I'm a bad mom--I do #8 all the time! I would rather have boogers on a sleeve than a face when I have no kleenex.

Salt H2O said...

If it's things YOUR mom would never say- the list is much, much longer. :)

Robin said...

Ha ha Kory! Good thing grandma is BLIND so she can't read that.

I do 3,4 and 8. and mom, you totally did #2 - told me all the bad, well most of the bad, stuff you did in high school. I was such an angel compared to you.

Linda said...

Kory is right. The list would be several pages, probably a book.
Robin, you were an angel by comparison, but I was a pretty good kid too.
Sally, I agree.
And, does anyone really call them tissues? I think we all say kleenex, which btw were a luxury when I was a kid. We used handkerchiefs which had to be washed and IRONED.

seaside said...

10. You don't need to iron those sheets.

11. If you don't like it, you don't have to eat it.

12. Don't bother cleaning up after cooking, I will do it.

13. My friends can wait, now what was it that you needed?

14. Did I lock you out for a few hours while I was inside, I am sorry, I made a mistake.

15. Don't eat the hard bread in the drawer, eat the soft, fresh bread.

16. No news is not good is just no news. 17. I better give you a phone call to find out if you are alright.

18. Do you need any money?

19. Can I help take care of your kids for you while you are gone?

20. You can wear your grubbies after church (sorry Linda, I was able to do that after you left the house - I just didn't ask).

And Linda, I don't know what was wrong with you ... mom never gave me a time to be home... she also gave me her credit card to go shopping. It could be that she knew I didn't like shopping and she also knew that I had heard your arguments with her while growing up so I knew when to be home.

Linda said...

Kathy, she knew you wouldn't obey her anyway, and she was afraid of you. Plus, she liked you (& the others) more. wah wah. She still hasn't figured out that I'm the best of the bunch.

davers said...

This could just as well have been titled "Things you can expect a Dad to say." ... except for #3, 5, 7, 9.